I have not, despite rumors to the contrary, fallen off the diet and exercise bandwagon in the last few weeks. Reports of this are untrue. No, I didn’t fall off. I jumped off, got my pant leg caught on the way over the side, fell face first into the pavement and got dragged for about 10 miles behind it.

But I cannot claim to have fallen off, as that would imply an involuntary action. I have known what I was doing the whole time.

I always seem to self-destruct near the end of a production run. I remember at one point during the rehearsal process for Frankenstein that a pair of jeans I liked to wear was almost falling off. By the end of the run they were tight. It happened during The Boys Next Door, and it’s happening now during Machinal. I don’t think I’ve gained all that much weight back, but when I look in the mirror it seems like I did. My face is looking HUGE to me right now. I don’t know if it’s just because I shaved off the goatee or what, but it looks to me like I’ve almost got a double chin going on again.

So today, like so many days before, I’m trying to pull myself back up on that damned wagon. We’ll see if I make it to the end of the day or not.

It isn’t helping that my face has been breaking out quite a bit recently. That’s a combination of stress, bad eating, and (I suspect) the fact that my doctor cut back my Doxycycline from twice a day to once. He also dropped my Prevacid dosage. I’m not really happy with either change, and I’m going to tell him as much the next time I go.

Bottom line, here? Feelin’ kinda on the ugly side today. Definitely not feelin’ like teh hawtness.

In less than two weeks I’ll be in Vegas. I wish it was for an actual vacation. I need one. Feburary and the Goth Cruise feels like a million years away right now, and at this point I have no plans for any down time until then. I need to schedule a week here somewhere, but as of yet there is nothing that jumps out to me as an opportunity to do so. At least, not in any context where I won’t be doing anything other than what I do right now. Except I’ll be able to sleep in later and can actually get out from behind the keyboard. Maybe that’s all I need.

A week of vacation from computers.

Although, in truth, I’ve actually been enjoying my World of Warcraft time more and more recently. It’s so awesome to be reconnecting with Scott Engle after so many years, and with Team Speak it’s almost as if we are in the same room.

I do want to start reading more again. I need to go to bed earlier and get some reading time in at night. Feels like there are cobwebs starting to form in certain parts of the old noggin.

Speaking of books, I ordered copies of a few of the shows that are going to be in the next Jobsite season from Amazon today. They didn’t have Phyro-Giants, and it really didn’t make sense to order Frankie and Johnny or Top Dog/Under Dog (as the former is pre-cast and the latter doesn’t have a role in it I could play).

In political news, the United States Supreme Court today proved, yet again, that the phrase “liberal activist judges” is highly inaccurate by enforcing the federal ban on marijuana and opening the door for the government to intervene in California where voters have approved medical uses of the drug. Does this decision bother me? To an extent. I’m upset that the law blocks the medicinal use of marijuana. Hell, I’m upset that the law blocks the use of marijuana period. If, however, the Supreme Court concludes that the Constitution, as it currently stands, gives the federal government the right to pass laws that override state rights I can only say that the laws need to change. Unlike those who have recently been trying to villify the judicial system for doing its job (and, coincidentally, stopping the complainers from violating our rights) I recognize the fact that sometimes what I feel should be legal or right just isn’t. Period. The solution is not to rally against the courts. The solution is to change the laws.

And if you don’t have enough support to do so…well….That’s the price of democracy, at times. You win some, you lose some.

I’ll take occasional losses over not even being allowed to compete any day of the week.