“My sister says you play Dungeons and Dragons. We should be friends.”

“Want to go to a fourth of July party?”

“Why didn’t you pull out?”

“eh, just break down and get a domain like the rest of us.”

“You should check out this bulletin board.”

“Nice leash.”

“What quest u guys working on?”

“Son. I’m sick.”

“It doesn’t look good, Mike.”

“The size of your sons head is proportional to yours, Mr. McGreevy. You have big heads. You also make beautiful babies. Go make some more.”

“I saw a job online today that I think you’d be perfect for.”

“I’m directing a show. It’s a rock musical, and I need you to come audition for it.”

“I’m giving you one of my access codes. You really need a live journal.”

“She didn’t make it.”

“No, he’s not coming back. He left. With Mary.”

“I’ll see you and your fucking kids in court!”

“Why don’t you take your son and get the fuck out of this house?!”

“Did you mean it when you said Kimmie could move in with you?”

“If that’s really what you two want to do, go do it. Now.”

“We’ve fallen in love with each other.”

“Have you seen the news? We’re under attack. They’ve bombed the World Trade Center!”

Perhaps more later as I think of them.

Got any of your own?