Tag Archives: facebook

FOMO?

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A man sits at a desk in front of a computer, resting his chin on his hand while contemplating whether to reactivate his Facebook and Instagram accounts.
Image credit: AI-generated image created by the author using a personal reference photo.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about starting up a new Facebook account.

I deactivated my Facebook and Instagram accounts over two years ago. I did so for several reasons, most of them revolving around my mental health (i.e. if I wanted to stay sane I didn’t need to see the shit I was seeing on Facebook, particularly things involving my family). Many of those reasons are still valid today, and for the most part I can honestly say that I don’t feel like my life is lacking because I’m not using Meta products (I also deleted my Instagram and WhatsApp accounts. On top of the stress Facebook was causing I have serious issues with the business practices at Meta and have a hard time reconciling my use of their products when I truly believe they are making the world an uglier place).

However…

The number of times I’ve talked with people over the last few years and realized half way through the conversation that they were talking about major life events as if I had known about them because they were posted on Facebook is not insignificant. Divorces. Deaths. Births. You name it. Facebook has become so pervasive that everyone just assumes you are connected with them on it and that you know all the minute details of their life. Honestly, a lot of those details are things I don’t need or even want to know, but it’s very disconcerting to feel like people are living their lives assuming you know all about them when you don’t. The opposite is true. In some cases, I feel like I’ve stopped existing. Like people are genuinely surprised when they see or hear from me, as if the fact that I no longer show up in their feeds is the equivalent of having moved on to some other plane of existence.

Not being on Facebook and Instagram has also had the odd effect of having to jump through hoops to find out what’s going locally. Many small businesses in the area rely entirely on Facebook for their online presence, and if you don’t have an account you can’t see any of it. Want to see a menu at a local restaurant? Want to see what your favorite local band is doing? Want to get an updated on the latest Hurricane from Denis Phillips? You need a Facebook or Instagram account.

The thing that has impacted me the most, though, is that I feel I’ve become largely disconnected from the local theater scene. I’m incredibly grateful for the folks who have kept in touch with me and reach out to me about my availability to perform in upcoming productions (namely the artistic directors for LAB Theater and Jobsite), but I hardly ever hear about upcoming auditions or see what my peers are performing in locally. Much of this is the a direct result of local arts coverage in the media basically being wiped out over the last few years, but it also goes back to what I was saying about personal information – people just assume that if you know because you’re on Facebook, or that if you wanted to know you would be.

I’ve also basically lost the ability to promote my work among my social circles. I mean, I post about what I’m doing over on my Bluesky account, but I think like 3 local people are connected to me there. Same goes with the local theater Subreddit (amusingly, the person who set up that subreddit is also one of my few local Bluesky buddies). The counter argument here, though, is that most of the people I would re-connect with on Facebook are theater people already. If you don’t know, theater people are notoriously bad at actually seeing shows they aren’t involved in. I’m not entirely sure why, but I think it really boils down to that whole “you get tired of eating at the restaurant you work in” thing. When you have a break from being in a show the last thing you want to do is go to see one.

This is all a very long way of saying I have no idea what I’m going to do. The more I think about it, the more I’m convinced that staying the course is the right choice. The benefits of being on those platforms are far outweighed by the negatives, and the last thing I need is yet another reason to stay tied to my devices. It’s not a completely painless choice, but I think it’s the right one for me.

This leads me to a question, though – For those of you who actually read my blog, would you be interested in updates about my upcoming shows? Should I focus on promoting myself here? I’d really be curious to know.

All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others.

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QTQE_rrBe_g

It’s 6 AM on the day before Dragon Con here in Atlanta. I had a crappy night of sleep due to some poor dining choices I made yesterday, and I haven’t even finished my first cup of coffee yet, so there’s a very real possibility that this post is going to get a little cranky.

But the subject makes me cranky, so it might have gone that way regardless.

After doing a major pruning of my friends list I started using Facebook again about a month ago. For the most part? It’s been a pretty pleasant experience. I no longer have to skim through pages of updates and posts that I really didn’t give a crap about to see updates from people who I actually want to stay connected to. That’s cool. Thing is, I still see some things that get my blood boiling. One of those things can be summed up in the use of the #AllLivesMatter hashtag (or the general attitude that is represented by that hashtag, even if it isn’t being used).

I want to say I get it, and that I understand the frustration, but I simply don’t. I can’t see how, with the massive amount of information we as a a people we have available to us in the information age, it’s not possible to see how there are major issues in our country regarding race that simply can’t be wiped away by insisting that people “stop playing the race card.”

What really bugs me about this is that more often than not this quiet racism is cloaked in comments about (primarily) African-American and Latino culture here in the country. “Those people” would do so much better in their lives if they would just “pull their pants up”, “learn how to speak properly”, and “stop acting like thugs.”

So, in other words, they should act more like a proper white person.

Ironically, these same people never seem to make those kind of comments about other whites unless said caucasian acts “ghetto”. I mean, while there are certainly exceptions to the rule you don’t often see your typical trailer park redneck contribute much to the betterment of society. See a picture of a white guy holding an assault rifle and standing in front of his pick up truck? Many likes! Yay, America! See a picture of a black guy holding the same rifle in front of his BMW? OMG THUGS!!

It’s gross.

I guess I’m speaking up about this now, and in a very public way, because I’ve had a bit of a personal epiphany. Not too long ago I had a relative refer to an African-American woman who was in an old velvet painting as a “jungle bunny.” He did this in my house, within earshot of children, and I said nothing. I’ve been disgusted with myself ever since. I’ve put up with this kind of thing from people I know for far too long, and I simply can’t ignore it any more. Which means I’m likely to continue having some very awkward conversations with people who I genuinely care for if I continue using Facebook.

Or I’m just going to unfriend them…or leave the service altogether.

I frankly don’t know.

What I do know is that I can no longer sit by while the pigs take over the farm.

Tweet This Link

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Image courtesy of Bruce Sallan - http://www.brucesallan.com/2012/03/25/are-you-a-socialmedia-addict/

Image courtesy of Bruce Sallan – http://www.brucesallan.com/2012/03/25/are-you-a-socialmedia-addict/

The company I work for considers themselves to be a Gallup Strengths-Based organization. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the concept, the long and the short of it is that the Gallup organization has a list of 34 traits that are apparently common in all people. These traits are referred to as strengths. When the company you work for decides that they want to become a strength-based organization (or you decide you want to find out what your strengths are on your own), you take a test and you get a list of the 34 strengths in in the order that they apply to you.

My number one strength is Input. What follows is a description of the type of person who has Input as one of their top strengths, according to the Gallup organization.

You are inquisitive. You collect things. You might collect information — words, facts, books, and quotations — or you might collect tangible objects such as butterflies, baseball cards, porcelain dolls, or sepia photographs. Whatever you collect, you collect it because it interests you. And yours is the kind of mind that finds so many things interesting. The world is exciting precisely because of its infinite variety and complexity. If you read a great deal, it is not necessarily to refine your theories but, rather, to add more information to your archives. If you like to travel, it is because each new location offers novel artifacts and facts. These can be acquired and then stored away. Why are they worth storing? At the time of storing it is often hard to say exactly when or why you might need them, but who knows when they might become useful? With all those possible uses in mind, you really don’t feel comfortable throwing anything away. So you keep acquiring and compiling and filing stuff away. It’s interesting. It keeps your mind fresh. And perhaps one day some of it will prove valuable.

I, without a doubt, fall into the former category of collectors. I collect information. I used to collect things, but I had a change of heart about that a few years ago and really try to live my life amassing as little stuff as possible. But information? Oh, I collect information. I want to know…well, everything. I ask questions constantly. In many ways, I’m like a child. I constantly want to know why.

I’m still not entirely sure why Gallup considers this a “strength.”

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Feedback sought – live blogging

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I decided to keep a running commentary on Twitter of the Republican presidential debate that was broadcast on CNN last week. I had an absolute blast doing so, but I am sure that the number of posts I made during that period annoyed some of my followers. At the very least the volume of tweets that cross posted to my Facebook page temporarily broke the link between the two.

There is another debate on Friday night and I have every intention of doing a running commentary again. My question, for those of you who would like to follow along, is how should I do so? Should I set up a live blogging plugin here and have the notices cross-posted to twitter and Facebook? Should I set up a special Twitter account specifically fir my live blogs? Should I do exactly what I did last tine and let anyone who doesn’t care to read my commentary ignore, filter, or drop me as they choose? Should I take sone other path I have not, as of yet, considered?

I’d really like some feedback on this because I loved doing it but I don’t want to do so if it’s going to annoy mire than entertain.

Thanks, all!

Edit – So this is how it would look if I did the live blog here.

[liveblog]

What is it worth?

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I follow a lot of folks on Twitter who, like myself, are very active in the social media community. These people, again like me, are very passionate about the importance of social media in the business world and about how valuable of a tool it can be to promote your business. Unfortunately, many of them seem to fall flat on their face when it comes to coming up with a valid justification as to why a business needs to be involved in social media. In fact, they very frequently tend to take offense at the very nature of the question. Which is, of course, a sure fire way to guarantee that the business you’re trying to convince to get into social media never well.

Return On Investment, kids. It’s not a dirty word. Get over it. The whole nature of taking offense at the idea of justifying why a business should spend money on your idea without being able to quantify where it will turn into profits for them is absurd. It is tantamount to an artist claiming that people “just don’t get” their work. It’s a cop out. Sure, it’s all fine and dandy that you might be doing something unique and awesome in your mind, but if you can’t prove to someone that giving you money for doing so is worth their time you have no business trying.

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Being broke

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Earlier this morning I ran an application on Facebook known as UnFriender. As the name should obviously imply, the application compares your current Friends list to previous snapshots and lets you know who has dropped you from their list since you last checked.

I do this because I am a horrible combination of narcissism and insecurity. I want everyone to like me, and when someone doesn’t I get all angst-ridden trying to figure out why. I blame my lifelong struggle with obesity. I’m sure I could explain that, but it’s easier to just say “It’s because I was fat as a teenager and nobody loved me” and leave it at that.

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